Thursday, March 4, 2021
Stupid Joke
Lost on a rainy night, a nun stumbles across a monastery and requests
shelter there. Fortunately, she's just in time for dinner and was
treated to the best fish and chips she's ever had. After dinner, she
goes into the kitchen to thank the chefs. She is met by two brothers
"Hello, I'm Brother Michael, and this is Brother Charles". "I'm very
pleased to meet you. I just wanted to thank you for a wonderful dinner.
The fish and chips were the best I've ever tasted. Out of curiosity,
who cooked what?" Brother Charles replied "Well, I'm the fish friar".
She turns the other brother and says "Then you must be...?" "Yes, I'm
the chip monk".
Stupid Joke
A man and a woman were dating. She, being of a religious nature, had held back the worldly pleasure that he wanted from her so badly. In fact, he had never even seen her naked.
One day, as they slowly drove down the freeway, she remarked about his slow driving habits. "I can't stand it anymore" she told him. "Let's play a game. For every 10 kilometres you drive over the 100-kilometre speed limit, I'll remove one piece of clothing".
He enthusiastically agreed and sped up the car.
He reached the 110 mark, so she took off her blouse.
At 120 off came the pants.
At 130 it was her bra and at 140 her panties.
Now seeing her naked for the first time, and traveling faster than he ever had before, he became very excited and lost control of the car.
He veered off the road, went over an embankment, and hit a tree!
His girlfriend was not hurt, but he was trapped. She tried to pull him free but alas he was stuck.
"Go to the road and get help" he said. "I don't have anything to cover myself with!" she replied.
The man felt around, but could only reach one of his shoes. "You'll have to put this between your legs to cover it up" he told her. So she did as he said and went up to the road for help.
Along came a truck driver. Seeing a naked, crying woman along the road, he pulled over to hear her story. "My boyfriend! My boyfriend!" she sobs "He's stuck and I can't pull him out!"
The truck driver looking down at the shoe between her legs replied "Ma'am if he's in that far, I'm afraid he's a goner!"
Stupid Joke
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little yellow bug and
was pulled over by a woman police officer who was also a blonde. The
blonde cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license. She dug through
her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it
look like?" she finally asked. The policewoman replied "It's square and
it has your picture on it". The driver finally found a square mirror
in her purse, looked at it, and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it
is" she said. The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it
back saying "Okay, you can go. I didn't realise you were a cop..."
Stupid Joke
Lost on a rainy night, a nun stumbles across a monastery and requests
shelter there. Fortunately, she's just in time for dinner and was
treated to the best fish and chips she's ever had. After dinner, she
goes into the kitchen to thank the chefs. She is met by two brothers
"Hello, I'm Brother Michael, and this is Brother Charles". "I'm very
pleased to meet you. I just wanted to thank you for a wonderful dinner.
The fish and chips were the best I've ever tasted. Out of curiosity,
who cooked what?" Brother Charles replied "Well, I'm the fish friar".
She turns the other brother and says "Then you must be...?" "Yes, I'm
the chip monk".
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